A couple of days ago I did a daily calm meditation on resistance and as they often do after the meditation, a graphic highlighting the main message popped up. Sometimes the message is a little new age for my taste and this was one of those…especially the ‘enlightened living” part. HOWEVER, the more I have pondered the message the more I see the wisdom.
And, it’s true — Scar tissue is stronger than original skin ever is. Scars are where the strength gets in — our breaking is where our strength gets in.
That’s all there is: You can either be broken by fear or broken by pride — or you can break into the surrendered, cruciform shape of Christ.
Break into a shape of a cross, arms out-stretched and surrendered, and break deep into the breaking waves — and you break into the deep, deep peace of God. In the midst of the storms — live shaped like a cross, arms broken wide open, and you can break into the the still cushion of the sea.
I don’t know about you but that is a frightening scene – arms wide open to the storms of life – but the storms are a fact of life…so I can either surrender to the work of God in my life with obedience or curl up and be broken without any hope of repair.
“After you get stung, you can’t get unstung no matter how much you whine about it.”
― Sue Monk Kidd, The Secret Life of Bees
I was in a meeting the other day whining (yes, I whine…sometimes a lot) about where I was in my walk – how I thought I should be further along…I should be better already…I should be beyond this place. I’m chuckling as I write because I SEE how demeaning I can be to myself…and yet, the voice persists. Afterwards, a wise one said to me that “perhaps should-ing all over myself was not a productive use of my energy…perhaps accepting and embracing the journey, the obstacles would serve me better” – sigh – back to that non-resistance.
At first glance, this seems like a terrible idea – or on some days a fabulous idea – as in run away. However, the idea is, WHAT are we grasping? I have some areas of my life that I realize are firmly grasped in my tight little fist – go ahead and look at your hands right now – and visualize your life. Are your hands open or closed, relaxed or clenched. For me, the nails are digging into flesh clenched. Non-attachment means letting go of how I think things should be and accepting them as the are. Back to both that non-resistance and non-judgement.
Can be defined as “freed from ignorance and misinformation” or “based on full comprehension of the problems involved” – or as I like to think – eyes open…solutions available…
So all of this is fine and dandy but HOW???
Gag me now but practice, practice, practice. It’s why I practice mindful meditation everyday. And the old adage – Time takes Time.
But it’s also about pursuing faith. I use pursing because being faithful is not passive. I used to look down at those that we’re faithful and thought they were being naive and/or submissive. Going back to that accepting things as they are – oh hell no I’ve said a many of time. Accepting feels fatalistic…like I’m giving up…but really, many, many times it’s about us insisting on our own way right? We know best. To live a faithful life takes great strength and obedience. It’s not something that just happens.
Last night, in a rare moment of sharing, Evan opened up about his doubts with God. He has a hard time believing in something he can’t see. Been there, done that. If I could only download my faith to him…but I can’t. My faith has been a hard fought wrestling match…and because of the blood, sweat and tears…and the pursing, I can claim it. It’s mine. He’s gotta find his own.
Pursue: verb (used with object), pursued, pursuing.
To strive to gain; seek to attain or accomplish (an end, object, purpose, etc.).
To proceed in accordance with (a method, plan, etc.).
To carry on or continue (a course of action, a train of thought, an inquiry, studies, etc.).
To practice (an occupation, pastime, etc.)
Pursuing faith is to strive, to have a plan, to carry on, to practice. For me, that means studying the Bible, getting on my knees and surrendering to God’s work in my life (and those I love), being in relationship with others, and most of all, showing up.
Through the fire
I won’t submit to any fear
Where I’ll go you’ve been before
All my trust is in you Lord
Hillsong – Pursue
xoxox – DM
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