The teenage brain…who can understand it? Tonight I started a 12-week parent group – not necessarily because I wanted to but because others thought it would be good for our family. I pretty much walked in resigned to an hour and half torture session. Much to my surprise I actually enjoyed the class – lots of fun learning about the brain and how whacked out it is at 17yo…I’ve blogged about that before.
But the fun stopped when the focused turned to us parents – specifically, how I react to my brain stunted teenaged man child. Oy – smacked right between the eyes. Some of it I already knew…I have classic co-dependent behavior traits – some of it is our situation, some of it is that Evan is my “baby”, some of it is my own family of origin, my own need to fix and fear – but regardless the reasons, I have some of the behaviors and I’m owning it and working on it. But what surprised me was the role my introversion plays in my parenting…I HATE being the bad guy – and while I’m all in (obvs) – parenting much like people exhausts me. As a result, I need to absolutely be vigilant in taking care of myself and not get to the point of exhaustion – tag the other parent in or better yet – go ahead and let it be two against one. It’s such a simple thing but was made obvious tonight.
There was much much more – head is still spinning but my final thought is one of gratitude. I REALLY did walk in with a closed, resigned mind but gratefully, the counselor was phenomenal and engaging. Furthermore, last week when I found out we were assigned this class I was more than irritated – one more damn thing to do each week – but seriously, tonight was a blessing in disguise.
Obstacles do not block the path, they are the path – Zen Proverb
Off to study the brain some more
xoxox – DM
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